My Journey With Health And Fitness – It’s Different This Time

An awesome day today. I had to say goodbye to one of my trainers as she is moving on which is quite sad to me but I know she appreciated me showing up with a card for her so I could say goodbye. But then it was an awesome lunch with one of our favourite couples and their daughter. They had a life threatening accident earlier in the year and we are so impressed with the recovery both of them have made. The one thing about the accident, it has made us realize we need to get together more than once or twice a year.

Last night we were out at a service club for dinner and a few drinks. We were sitting with a long time friend and he commented that I didn’t need to lose any more weight as I look so good. He also commented that when I lost the weight before I went too far and ended up looking far too gaunt. I thought that was odd and told him I am actually only 3 lbs heavier than I was at my lowest weight 2 years ago. He seemed surprised by this.

I thought about it an realize it is because this time I have done things differently. Yes, last time I watched what I ate and exercised. However, this time it was not just exercising by walking or running, it has been whole body workouts. There is absolutely no part of my body that isn’t toned (though I admit some of it is under some excess skin) and I have muscles that I never thought were possible. This has meant that weight has come off in different places this time and the most noticeable is that I my face is not quite as skeleton as it was before. Really that is not a bad thing.

So now I am going to get a bit personal. The one area that I did not need to lose extra weight is my breasts. Please understand, I have never been heavy chested even at my top weight. This time round though I have shrunk my breasts to the point that I can’t even find a bra in my size. Apparently that is the tradeoff for my face not being gaunt.

I want to end on this reminder, no one should comment on someone’s weight or appearance unless it is their own. Don’t get me wrong, the friend that made the comments last night did so with the best of intentions and because they care for me and I get that. But really, I am good enough at body shaming myself and don’t need help from others. I do hope that one day I will get to the point that I fully accept myself for whatever size I am but even after 3 years, I am not there yet.