My Journey With Weight Health And Fitness – Regrets

So a trainer today asked if we were all die hard morning people since we were at a 5:30am class. I said I don’t know but when we are done I’m going to do a 7km run. After class she approached and asked me if I was training for something. I explained I am just doing whatever I can to lose those pesky 2 pounds. We then got into a conversation about my journey and she stunned me when she told me she thought I must be a marathon runner. Huh? Apparently it is because I am so fit and do crazy things like a 7km run after doing a bootcamp class.

I sometimes look back at the regrets I have in my life. Now don’t get me wrong, I absolutely know that I have some amazing things that have happened to me. I had a successful career not just with the Union but also as a financial analyst for BC Hydro. I have made huge differences to my community through my volunteer work. I have had the awesome opportunity to mentor many people. I was lucky enough to leave the cycle of poverty and build a great life for me and my family. All of those things make me proud of where I came from and where I am now.

However, sometimes I look back and think there are things I regret. I have always regretted that my Dad not only didn’t get to see me be the first on either side of the family to get a university degree but also that he never got to meet my husband. I still regret that I opted to go to work instead of spending the day with my Mom when she died. I sometimes regret the fact that there have been times when I should have used my voice but didn’t because of what I thought would be repercussions. I regret not being comfortable hugging my family and friends especially those that I have lost.

I guess selfishly I really regret that I have come through this journey and those that meant the most to me never got to see this change. Not so much with my Dad because he passed away before I ever became obese. But I think of people like my friend Dorothy who got so offended when I told her my doctor said my back pain was from being fat and lazy (ok, those were not exactly his exact words but were certainly what they sounded like to me). I remember my friend Scott just weeks before he passed away telling me I needed to slow down and think about my health. I think of my friend Gord and how if he saw me now he would be cheekily teasing me about my vanity.

I write this and realize the biggest regret would be my Mom not seeing this amazing change in me. She always worried about me and the stress I put on myself. I think if she was still here she would be my biggest champion and would be cheering me on every step of the way.

But you know what, I’m ok with all of those regrets because typing this blog I just went through some great memories. Every person I just touched on had an incredible impact on my life. Now I kinda think those regrets might not be a bad thing, they help me to remember some pretty special people that I called my family and friends.